Lexa's Thoughts as she Dies
by Jen9674
Summary: My take about what Lexa was thinking about while she was dying.
Author's Note: This is my first story sorry if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes. Since this is my first story I would love some constructive feedback about what didn't work and what did.

Lexa's Thoughts as she Dies

After Clarke has left my room five minutes have not even passed when I hear gunshots coming from hers. Worried for her safety I rush over to her room and open the door when suddenly I feel searing pain in my stomach. I look down at my stomach and see that I was shot.

I look up at Clarke who has a look of horror on her face and collapse. Clarke attempts to break my fall and shouts at Titus in panic who is crawling over to Clarke and me help me get her to the bed!

Titus picks me up and lies me down gently in the bed. Titus looks down at me and says with his vice quivering in horror and self-disgust what have I done!

I need something to stop the bleeding! Clarke shouts at Titus and he looks frantically in the room for some kind of makeshift bandages.

Suddenly I feel a flash of pain from where I was shot and I see Clarke pressing down on my wound to attempt to slow the bleeding lie still ok lie still she tells me. But at this point I know it's too late.

I look to Clarke and tell her don't be afraid because I know when I die she will blame herself for not being able to save me and will feel responsible for the events that led up to my death.

But right now she is still in denial about the inevitable and tells me you're going to be fine stay still. Titus comes back with a bowl that has some white cloths and water in it. Clarke rips open my shirt to reveal the gunshot wound. She grabs the bowl takes out the cloths and pours some water on the wound to disinfect it then Clarke grabs one of the cloths to try and slow the bleeding. She's losing too much blood Clarke tells Titus.

While Clarke is treating my wound Titus pulls out the red bag that is needed when the Commander dies. He opens it and reveals a thin black rectangular container that has a skull on it. He lays out the red cloth and starts to pull out the necessary tools to extract the Commanders spirit from my body once I die.

Clarke notices this and asks what the hell is that? Titus what are you doing? I feel my pain increasing and start to gasp Clarke notices this I will fix you just stay with me she tells me in desperation.

I start to feel myself slowly fading away and know I will be leaving my body soon. I look to Titus and he comes towards me. Get away from her! Clarke shouts at Titus but he ignores her and bends down cupping my cheek he pleads forgive me heda.

Despite the fact that he shot me I can't find it in myself to hate him in my final moments. I'm only worried about what will happen to Clarke after I die. In Trigedasleng I tell Titus you will never again attempt to harm Clarke. Swear it. I swear it he replies. I believe him and know that from now on he will protect Clarke out of love and loyalty to me. Now that I know Clarke will be safe I can rest in peace. The only regret that I have is that I did not tell her that I love her when I had the chance. Slowly I close my eyes and open them again I tell Titus do your job serve the next as you have served me, Flamekeeper.

Titus steps aside and Clarke takes his place. Shaking her head at me she says hey heda don't you dare give up. I'm not I tell her my spirit will find- No! She cuts me off I'm not letting you die. In sadness I gaze at her there's nothing you can do now I tell her. The next Commander will protect you. I don't want the next commander I want you Clarke replies.

Titus finishes preparing the tools to extract the Commanders spirit and says I'm ready heda. Clarke glances at Titus then back at me in denial. Titus then dabs a finger in my blood and runs it down his forehead in a line and puts a circle at the end.

Clarke I call out to her I'm here she tells me. ai gonplei ste odon. She shakes her head no, no I won't accept that. You were right Clarke life is about more than just surviving.

After I tell her that I can see Clarke has finally accepted that it is my time and with tears forming in her eyes she begins to recite the travelers blessing of her people. In peace, may you leave this shore. In love, may you find the next. Safe passage on your travels, until our final journey to the ground. May we meet again.

Her voice quivering on the last words she bends down and gives me a final kiss. Her lips on mine are the last thing I feel when I die.

Author's End Note: Thanks for reading my story. Sorry if it reawakened any feelings about Lexa's tragic and completely unnecessary death. This was an idea I've had for awhile and writing about what Lexa might of been thinking while she was dying helped me cope with my own feelings.


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